So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
