your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
the day after is always just damage control
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
Randomize
