Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
