is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
