16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
