Dual....:-)
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize