Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
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