what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She bit a glass in half.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
The uberlube is also flammable
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Randomize
