One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
