I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize