# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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