OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I found my underwear on the sidewalk 8 blocks from her house while on my walk of shame. I also found our beer bag and a full beer in the bush.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
