Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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