Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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