Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Randomize
