I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize
