I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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