He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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