every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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