We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Randomize
