we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
Randomize
