Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
