Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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