But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Red Bull/Vodka? You bet I'm showing everyone my penis tonight.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
