Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
