I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
