did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
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