i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I met the friendliest cop last night
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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