the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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