feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
