i always forget guys have bellybuttons
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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