Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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