Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I still have a little drunk in my system
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
