So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Randomize
