apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
