Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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