Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
That's when you crack a 10am beer
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
Randomize
