And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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