I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
