Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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