you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Well I just put wine in my tea
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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