A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
babies were throwing up all over the place
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
