I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
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