These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize