I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
