we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
