I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Randomize
