Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
