talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
