of course. lets lasso hookers.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
i dont even know how to be here
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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